Starting from Scratch:

  You know that feeling? That irrational desire to raise your hands to your ears and scream at the world to just stop because its too much to cope with?

  There isn't really an accurate word for it is it? There is this small part within me that refuses to accept common words like stress and anxiety to express my predicament. I mean , come on, if my world is falling apart and someone comes to me saying that "Hey, its just stress! it will pass." I wont care who you are or how you outrank me before i do this:

(such a waste of good cereal)

   All of you reading this right now are completely different human beings. Not one person can be compared to any other person in the world. Even if you face the same circumstances the way you react to them will be different.

  More than likely though we experience this feeling at that very time. When our psychology feels the compulsion to analyze us with those of us who surround us.

So here are some random  facts to make you feel bad(er?):

• Shawn Mendes was 17 years old when he sang "Stitches"
• Malala Yousufzai was 17 when she received a Nobel price award
• Christopher Paolini was 15 when he started working on his best-selling novel "Eragon"
• Emma Watson was 11 when she played "Hermione Granger" in Harry Potter 
• Cristiano Ronaldo was 16 years old when he started playing for Manchester United
• Jeon Jungkook was 15 when he left for Seoul to begin his official training

(*awestruck*)

  Wait i know what you are thinking. That these are amazing talented people,they are exceptions not everyone can do this.

   I'm about to say something. Yes it is redundant. and you'll probably scroll through the rest of my blog whilst rolling your eyes (repeatedly) but the point here is that this can actually fix your life. I'm here to fix your life and I want nothing in return. Just read and understand the thing: The only difference between us and these amazing people who we effortlessly label as "God-gifted" or "Perfect" without bothering to search for what makes them so is that they knew what they wanted to do.

(cue for dramatic eye roll)

Now you're probably sitting there laughing like "Oh i know that I want a big house and a car which i can show off to everyone "(i really don't get the big house deal) or " I really want good grades."  or " I would do anything to impress someone significant to me".

(cue for hysterical laughter)

  Here is the thing. All those things that you think you want? You actually don't. That is the saddest part of this. People tell me that there should be clear lines between fiction and reality.But how can we call reality reality when it is just a series of well placed illusions?

Those things you think you want?

You don't want them. You need them.

Why do you need them? Because you've been lead to believe that they are everything by incessant proclamations of their importance by people you believe in.

No more than that actually.

You have been lead to believe that you are useless and these things are your last chance at redemption for an unknown and untold error you committed in maybe another life.

Try to think for once.

What have you ever done since you gained consciousness to be treated like you are being treated.

By whom? you ask

Who not? Society? Elders? Expectations? The usual or maybe something else entirely for you.

  You know what is really absurd? At the end of the day when your fingers ache to be pointed you do not even know who to blame. Everyone of us is a victim to this system that we so unwittingly created. 

Who did it does not matter. The fact that you are subjecting yourself to a lifetime of it does.

So what do you really want? Really tell me. 

You don't know do you?

Completely clueless about the very question that defines who you are to others.

Do you feel it? The anxiety?

  The world falling apart? Or just your world falling apart? Can it really be called your world when it isn't even your life? When you don't even breathe for yourself?

What was that? You're going somewhere? 

Are you?

Or was that a push?

  Are you even walking? Or are you letting people push you along? Allowing yourself to believe their illusions. Telling yourself that others know what is best for you? That your current suffering is of a temporary nature? That if you endure everything just a little more you will cross that line? That line drawn by the society? The line which classifies everyone below the topper as a complete failure? 

  True those people claim to love us unconditionally. Maybe they even do. But remember even if someone wants the best for you? There is no possible way for them to know what is actually best for you.They will blindly implement quoted examples into your life without pausing even for a moment to consider how every condition cannot be applied on even the two same people much less an entire generation.

  So what do you really want? Encountering this question will undoubtedly be one of the scariest things you have ever done in your life. Once you get the answer it will change everything and that will only be the start. The only constant you will have from there on will be hostility and pain. As you obliterate your previous image and create a new one , as you try to start from scratch you will realize that society isn't all too kind to people who wish for change. It doesn't matter if that change is for your own good. It doesn't matter if it directly affects only you. 

  But it is either that or what you already have. You have a choice. A decision to make that will determine whether you were on the sidelines being pushed by people who were themselves being pushed , or were you that runner? That sole person who ran when others were gawking? That person who screamed when others were too afraid to whisper? That one person who jumped when others waited?

  Because there will always be one person. When the time comes and we have to choose between being free and being safe most of us will choose being safe.

  Most of us will label the runners the shouters and the jumpers as selfish. Selfish for stirring trouble in an apparently smoothly functioning system. The glitches. The outsiders.

  But that is where we err. Those glitches aren't there for themselves. By the time that they rally enough support for their cause, muster enough strength they will be gone. Nothing but a fading memory of a visionary. A genius. A revolutionary. It would have gained them nothing. They head there knowing that it will gain them nothing.

  When i strip the illusions it is these selfish people that are the most selfless. These artists who crave to repaint the future and get notoriety and fame for their efforts instead. Who sing about redemption, debate about affects rather than stress upon the causes. It is the people who choose to be the change rather than witness it. It is the people who actually do something for a better world rather than play with the idea of one.