Our Selfish Fears

  I look around me and I witness a static world. People are coiled like tensed springs, impatient bated breaths marking the monotony of every tick of the clock. The universe’s apprehension marked by its silence as it braces for impact, flinching ever so imperceptibly under the weight carried by what is to come. We are living in the constant fear that our foundation is not strong enough to survive this imminent onslaught. The world’s eventual collapse is becoming increasingly inevitable for its ensuing remake. I look and wonder if the gradual disintegration of what defines us as human beings is visible to only me.

  I realize that my opinion is justified by my scrutiny. In the way our youth is no longer given an option. There is some part within each student that understands that excelling is their only choice, not for a better future but for the endurable peace that accompanies good grades in our houses. Our focus along with those of several subsequent generations has been pivoted to mindless memorization of facts and figures rather than the gain and application of knowledge. The institutes whose very core of creation was to help us transform into better versions of ourselves find themselves perfectly content with our exceeding results; their displeasure confined to only those of us who are academically –rather than morally- incorrect; our guardians finding pleasure in the fact that we win regardless of the way that victory is attained. We, who should be performing the duty of helping others believe in their ability to bring about a change, are serving the purpose of lowering their precariously flailing self-esteem.

  I observe, how talent is being mercilessly crushed under the burden of keeping up with social appearances. In our corner of the world, living off others’ assumptions of us and rising up to our reputation has gained precedence over everything. We find ourselves incapable of learning because we choose to copy mistakes rather than make any of our own.

  We feel the defects of our seemingly impeccable system and feel no obligation to confront them. We find ourselves playing along with this ruse, preferring to hide our flaws under the blinding contours of our dwindling and exaggerated successes. While feigning oblivion we have also drawn lines. Indiscernible as they are, they could never have been more prominent; barriers dispensing the illusion of tranquility as they separate us from the world. We choose to define ourselves by our passions and victories but everything fades away when it’s time for a reality-check.

  The world defines us. Its current state defines ours. As I survey the world, I survey the damage. The damage I let knowingly be inflicted whenever I failed to correct anyone around me for fear that I would be labeled as an intruder and treated as an outcast. It seems to me that this fear is as selfish as we have become as human beings when we choose to distance ourselves from the world while playing the charade of independence.